sharing the pregnancy...and my expansion project...

So much of this pregnancy has been about me-me-me (not by choice, let me tell you), that it was a real joy last night to share something with my husband other than complaints, whining and pestering. There was no doubt the baby was real active yesterday evening--in fact, it was squirming around so much I was feeling nauseous. Matt pressed his hand against my belly and felt the baby sloshing around in there, even catching a punch or two. It was pretty special.

Boy, the ultrasound tech wasn't kidding when he told us that the baby would double in weight and really stretch out over the two-week period between our ultrasounds. My belly has definately expanded and I'm feeling more definite movement. I've been hungrier too, trying to keep up with the rapid growth of the baby.

I've read stories about women who get sad after their babies are born because the focus becomes all about the baby. Some women feel left behind, like no one cares about how they're doing anymore. That's got to be an awful feeling. I mean, it's difficult enough losing one's identity when transforming into a baby-growing vessel--it's really all people want to know about--but to have that happen again when the baby arrives? It's no wonder some women get the blues.

If you ask me, the focus has been all about the baby since the day we made our big announcement--it just presents itself via concern for me, since I am the baby and the baby is me at this point in time. But, we don't let the baby be the only focus of our lives.

I work hard to keep my life balanced and to not let my pregnancy overwhelm me or the people around me. I really don't want to be one of those tunnel-visioned pregnant women (although you can't really tell from this tunnel-visioned blog, which I purposefully decided to do in order to chronicle this journey). I am a worker, student, wife, sister, daughter, volunteer, friend, advocate and supporter. All of those things are important parts of who I am too. I don't see this experience as losing my identity, but growing as a person. I'm not really changing who I am, it's more like an expansion project (no pun intended).

It's crazy, really, all of the things one ponders after becoming pregnant :)